Loss of a Preterm Child

When is it time to get help?

It is not fair to expect you to “get over” the loss of your preterm child, even if other people tell you the opposite. It’s normal to experience grief when you’ve experienced a severe loss. The symptoms of grief are problematic if you’ve been experiencing them for a prolonged time and/or they are severe enough to affect your daily life – eating, sleeping, working, relationships, etc. for an extended time. It’s easy to slip from sadness over the loss to depression, anxiety, and it can even be a trigger for substance problems. It’s also hard to be objective when it comes to your own grief or depression, so if your loved ones are expressing concern about you, you should consider seeking help.

Extreme grief treatment methods

Some common treatment methods for dealing with the extreme grief of losing a pre-term child include:

• Grief work therapy refers to the methods used in counselling that help people to grieve loss and understand their emotions associated with the loss in a healthy way with the ultimate goal of moving forward.
• Acceptance and commitment therapy encourages clients to accept the difficulties and misfortunes of life. Clients learn coping techniques to not dwell on negative emotions by staying in the present.
• Person Centered Therapy differs from more traditional therapeutic approaches in the belief that, while the therapist has expertise in many areas, the client is the expert on themselves and their lived experiences. People are essentially trustworthy and have a vast potential for understanding themselves while also being able to ultimately resolve their own problems when guided properly.
• Emotionally focused therapy is based on observations and experience. It looks at emotions and emotional intelligence, which helps support stronger and more secure relationships by helping better understand how our actions impact others, and how our emotions drive our interaction.
• Faith based therapy is using science-based therapeutic techniques that are administered by a therapist with similar spiritual beliefs or an understanding of those beliefs. This is not based on any one religion or spiritual belief.

Your therapist will talk with you about the best treatment method for your individual circumstances and unique needs.