I know I have some kind of problem along with depression and anxiety. I can’t seem to leave my ex, no matter how many times and how hard I try, I always end up running back. I can’t help it, everytime we break up, I start crying alot and then I feel an immense panic and I feel like I’m going to die if I don’t go back to him because he’s the only one that loves me. I always end up running back, and I know it’s not right because I feel the regret right after and I go through the mental abuse once again. He’s just not a good guy. This has been going on for 2 years now and I just want to completely end it, but how do I do that if I feel this panic and I feel like I’m going to die? I don’t really want to ask my friends’ help, theyve given up on me because they’ve told me to leave him but since I always go back, they don’t even know what to say anymore. Please help, anyone I’m just so tired of being stuck in this circle and being taken advantage of because I always go back. thank you Background: I had an abusive drunk dad and a mom that never showed the affectionate love I always wanted. I felt lonely all the time since I can remember at the age of 5 till now. My whole family never liked me, this idk why, and they hated me even more when I rebelled and ran away from home. I know this has to do something with why I can’t stay away from y ex but I just need help 🙁 I already go to therapy but I can’t see my therapist when I feel like it and I’ve been doing good, except in this part and I just can’t seem to shake it off The last person I was with before this guy, was a bad guy as well and it took me 4 years to finally leave him. I want to break this habit and be able to leave once I see something is wrong but where do I get the strength?