In the last two years I have gone through some major losses including losing my business, divorce, loss of house, cheating now ex-girlfriend and a close friends’ suicide. I was forced to move to my home town and now work a temp job while renting a room. I’m not really sure if I’m dealing with all of the losses alright. I am constantly anxious, depressed and am unable to concentrate at work. I am in constant fear that more tragic events will happen. Even more I expect them. I’ve lost total faith in myself and others. I even avoid friends and family as I’m ashamed of what I’ve become. It seems like every time I make positive step another “oh my God” moment happens which makes the light at the end of the tunnel seem so far away. I have also developed what I’m assuming is nervous tick when things get stressful. I would consult a doctor but am not currently covered. Any suggestions?
Thank you for your question. I’m so sorry to hear of all the challenging events you’ve experienced in your life recently.
You mentioned that you don’t have coverage but I do recommend seeking psychological support. Insight has reduced rate counselling available but I understand that unless it’s free, sometimes even reduced rate is too much when you’re struggling financially. There are some very low-cost or no-cost options available. It may be an online support group, an app or a crisis line/ call centre but there are ways to obtain support. The simplest way to find this support is to simply Google “Free counselling” then add your location. If you’re in Alberta there are several options. Visiting (or calling) 211 is a helpful service as well.
If you, or someone you know is considering suicide, and is in a dangerous or life-threatening situation, please call 911 or proceed to your nearest emergency room.
For immediate help outside of our office hours, throughout Alberta, please call 211 or one of the following distress lines:
- Edmonton: The Crisis Centre call 780 482 HELP (4357)
- Greater Edmonton region: Rural Distress Line at 1-800-232-7288.
- Calgary: 403 266 HELP (4357)
So, let’s talk about what might happen in therapy.
The therapist may ask you to process the past two years’ events through talk therapy – also called psychotherapy. This may help you better understand the grief you’re likely experiencing following these losses and increase your emotional understanding of what occurred. The grief process can be challenging because emotional pain resulting from something or someone you love is gone. Grief can disrupt how your body functions physically and can explain your symptoms. Your experience of these intense symptoms indicates that you have difficulties functioning normally. This indicates that it is time to seek some help. Therapy can help you develop the skills to cope with these losses.
Additionally, I would recommend addressing the possibility of trauma. These losses you have experienced are significant, and understandably, you seem to have difficulties moving past these events. Your symptoms such as anxiety and depression are both highly common trauma responses. Therefore, I would strongly recommend that you seek a trained trauma therapist to help you gain some tools to get you back on track. I recommend clicking on the following links to learn more about:
As a therapist, I would also apply Existential therapy to help you discover meaning within the experiences in your life. Additionally, a therapist can help increase your coping skills to reduce the symptoms you are experiencing. An example of this is teaching you about the physical reactions from our bodies when enduring stressful times. By naming what is going on in our bodies, we have a greater ability to control what is happening.
I hope you are able to find the support you need to get through this very challenging time. It is possible to overcome these losses and to manage your symptoms. I wish you the very best on your journey.