Dealing with Divorce or Separation

Making the decision to end your relationship – temporarily as in a separation, or permanently as in divorce – is a very personal and difficult decision to make. If children are involved it can become very complicated. If you’ve made the decision to end a relationship, ideally it is done with mutual respect, dignity, and fairness. Even if this is the case, a separation or divorce often brings feelings of grief, guilt, anxiety, sadness, or relief. If you are going through a difficult separation or divorce – especially one that has involved infidelity and you are navigating custody battles or the division of assets, it can be even more challenging.

When is it time to get help?

No one enters a relationship expecting it to end. You begin with such hope and often feel devastated when it ends. Especially if you were not the one to make that decision. Whether you decided to end the relationship, or your partner did, you may be experiencing some of the following:

Anxiety

  • Inability to stop worrying about your concerns
  • Feelings of never-ending stress
  • Being easily startled and/or quick to panic
  • Feeling socially isolated or alienated from others in your life
  • Problems in your social relationships due to the feelings of being vulnerable or elevated arousal.
  • Fatigue, trouble catching your breath, headaches
  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Trembling, muscle tension
  • Diarrhea
  • Sweating
  • Heart palpitations

Depression

  • Indecisiveness and ability to concentrate
  • Feeling guilty
  • Feeling worthless
  • Frequent thoughts of committing suicide or of death
  • Lack of interest in everyday activities
  • Lack of joy in things or activities that used to bring pleasure
  • Feeling irritated
  • Insomnia or excessive sleeping
  • Headaches
  • Back pain, chest pain, muscle aches and joint pain
  • Digestive problems
  • Exhaustion and fatigue
  • Change in appetite or weight
  • Self destructive behaviour (alcohol or drug use/abuse)

 Grief

  • Extreme sadness
  • Inability to function
  • Obsession with the failed relationship
  • Feelings of anger or guilt
  • Numbness
  • Irritability
  • Withdrawing from others
  • Lack of appetite
  • Digestive problems
  • Sleeplessness or sleeping too much
  • Feeling achy
  • Headaches

Low self esteem

Feelings of anger

Feelings of relief – but possibly guilt for having those feelings – especially if children are involved.

If the effects of your divorce or separation are impacting your daily life or ability to move forward, seeing a therapist who can support you through this major life transition will help.

Sometimes couples will seek divorce or separation counselling to help them to negotiate a fair and amicable separation and the best way tot support their children. Insight can help with that too.

What will I get out of treatment regarding divorce or separation with Insight Psychological?

Divorce or separation can have a big impact on your emotional, psychological and even physical health. It affects your children, if you have any, and can take a toll on your finances as well. We can support you as you transition through this major life change. Depending on the severity of your concerns, we will also employ proven treatment methods that will help you to overcome the problematic symptoms you may experience during or after your divorce or separation.